Considering relationship counselling may feel like a huge and courageous step to take, and it is. However, many couples will experience relationship problems at some point, and having someone to help you along the way can make all the difference.
People seek help for many different reasons: some people come at a time of crisis in their lives such as an affair or illness; others for long-standing issues relating to sexual intimacy, parenting, infertility, or past trauma, to name a few. Emotionally Focused Therapy can help.
What is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?
EFT is acknowledged as one of the most thoroughly researched, clearly defined, and empirically validated approaches in the field of couple therapy. This approach sees emotional closeness, safety and intimacy as being essential and at the core of a loving and meaningful relationship. Research studies find that after 12-20 sessions, 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery, and 90% of couples show significant improvement. EFT has been shown to be an effective approach for couples coping with relationship distress across a range of issues, across various cultures, with traditional and non-traditional families, and with LGBTQ+ relationships.
How do I work?
As an EFT therapist, my approach is collaborative in helping you as a couple to identify the repeated patterns of conflict in your relationship, that create distance and disconnection between you. I work with you to gain a deeper understanding of the difficult emotions you may be experiencing as a result. My goal is to support you both to make sense of these patterns and reactions which have led to feelings of disconnection between you both, and then to safely share your experiences and difficult emotions, re-establishing safety and security and the bond between you both.
Through the counselling sessions you will learn together how to:
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- Address stuck patterns and negative cycles in your relationship
- Make sense of your own emotions and those of your partner
- Learn more about your own and your partner's inner world and emotional needs
- Develop deeper understanding, closeness and safety in the relationship
(This follows the recommended guidance from the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy)
Of course counselling isn't a magic remedy. Whilst a counsellor's role is to facilitate safety, healing and change, it requires that you are both willing to change and committed to working on yourself and your relationship.
How many sessions will we need?
During your first session we will discuss the number of sessions you may wish to have. If you want to come short-term then we can agree a specific number of sessions and a realistic goal to work on. Some people prefer an open-ended arrangement where they can finish when they feel they have completed the work. I always review on a regular basis what we are working on and how therapy is helping you.
How much will it cost?
£85 per session (60 minutes)
Sometimes it can be helpful to chat on the phone before booking a first session. I am happy to offer a free initial consultation for 10-15 minutes to discuss your needs.